Friday, 2 May 2014

What's Really In my Handbag!

I see a lot of 'What's in my bag' post floating around the blogger land and I have to admit, they're not my favourite posts...please don't hurt me (*hides behind her very badly painted nails*). However, today  I decided to do such a post, but this time it's got a twist. I'm doing a what's REALLY in my handbag cause actually it's not full of wonderful pretty things...it's full of crap, crap I don't use!


I want to start this off by saying two things. Firstly I have no idea how girls can do small handbags?! Girls with teny tiny satchels or clutches baffle me and don't get me started on those girls that don't even have handbags at all. I have one motto and one motto in life only, never trust a girl that doesn't have a handbag! I mean, where do they keep their make up bag, where do they put their huge bulging purse that's full of £10's worth of shrapnel, where do they keep their kitchen sink (because you never know, you might need it when you quickly pop to Sainsbury's) and what exactly are they hiding?!

Secondly I am not a girl who packs lightly. Ever since I can remember I have completely over packed for everything, be that holidays, weekends away and even for (as I said above) popping to the supermarket. I have the most irrational fear that once I leave the house I might need something and it won't be with me, therefore I shove as much as humanly possible in my handbag. Soooo when World War 3 does break out as I'm walking down the street I'll be ok cause I'll have my 'how to survive World War 3 kit' in my bag. Ok, maybe that's a bit of an exaggeration but my bag always weights a tone absolutely everywhere I go because I'm just a handbag contents hoarder. On the odd occasion I do decide to empty out my bag a little it still weights 3/4's of a tone and I have to admit, my shoulders are starting to suffer.

So after all that, what is actually in there? Well instead of pretty make up bags, super cute phone cases and designer purses my handbag is full of much less glamorous things. Obviously I have the usual things purse, phone and oyster card case (as having you oyster card hidden in your big purse, making you to stand at the barriors for 5 minutes trying to find it is a cardinal sin in London Town) but there are some little extra's in my bag that most bloggers tend to skip over.

1. Receipts, receipts, receipts! There are bloody receipts everywhere in my bag. They're in all the pockets, floating around the bottom, falling out of my purse  and sticking to everything I need in there. Every time I open my bag out flies about 20 receipts and that doesn't even make a dint in the amount still in there. Now I do have to save receipts for work to claim back my lunches however I keep those in my purse so I don't loose them...this is clearly a pointless exercise as I'm clearly not emptying the others out anyway. No word of a lie I found a receipt for mid September 2013 in my bag the other day. I don't even think I owned my bag in mid September. I clearly have a problem.

2. Rubbish! Now I don't mean rubbish in the sense of just things I don't need, I mean literal rubbish. Chocolate wrappers, chewing gum packets, sweet wrappers, I even have a questionable looking apple in there right now. I've been meaning to eat it all week at work but the vending machine wins every time! Why I use my handbag as a bin is beyond me.


3. Nappy bags. Yep you read that right...nappy bags! "Oh she must have kids" I hear you say. Nope, but I do have an explanation. Obviously every woman has 'lady products' in their bag but I have a whole shelves worth in my bag all month round just in case my body decides to defy science and have weekly cycles instead. Now the nappy bags are just to dispose of these things we do not speak of in a much more cleanly manner when I'm out an about. So I do have a logical reason to have one in my bag from time to time but still, you don't half get some funny looks when you pull on out with your phone.

4. A pad lock! Even I can't explain this one?!?

5. If anyone needs a red lipstick but they're not sure what shade of red they'd like, well I'm your gal...I have 20 red's floating around my bag!

6. Now this is more of something I don't have in my handbag. A bloody umbrella. I took it out when we were having that nice weather and then suddenly...BOOM...it's monsoon season again and I'm stood there like a drowned rat. A drowned rat with no eyes cause they've been pocked out by all the short people who actually had their brollies in their bags but left their consideration at home. In London there are many occation's where you personal space is invaded and you just get used to that but throw umbrella's into the mix and people don't seem to think to maybe give a little bit of exta room. They also don't think that their umbrella level is my face level... BAM umbrella to the retina.

and finally 7. Something a bit similar to the umbrella situation cause I never have this when I need it either but always have it when I don't, and that's my phone charger. Now if you are an Iphone user you will be fully aware of how awful the battery life is but mines great...when I don't use my phone. If I use it for more than 15 minutes whilst on my travels my battery icon in the corner suddenly turns into the countdown clock. I can see it ticking away second after second and suddenly all panic kicks in. I feel for my phone charger in my bag, "it was in there yesterday" I think to myself "but I didn't need it.....so I took it out...oh for god sakes!" Then that initial panic turns to out right fear. What happens if I get stranded in the middle of no where (in the most populated and busiest public transport city in the country), what happens if I suddenly really need to ask someone "should I buy those shoes I saw in the shop window" because it really is a life or death situation, or what if Zac Efron suddenly wants to call me up cause he's read my blog and things we'd really "connect!" Well I'll never know cause my battery f'ing died!!!

And that's what's really in my handbag! What's the weirdest thing you've found in yours. Answers on a postcard please...or just in the comments below.

Thanks for reading,
Hannah xxx
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16 comments

  1. Found a used stick from a lillpop stuck to the bottom once...wasn't elegant at all.

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  2. Fab post, really well written! It's nice to see an honest view of what's in your bag as I feel many are staged. Also, I love the fact you carry 20 red lipsticks haha! :)

    Style Sunrise

    :) x

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    Replies
    1. aw thanks hun that means a lot cause it's something different for me! Haha yes you have to have a hand full of lippies floating around!!!

      Hannah xxx

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  3. I found about 5 sticky haribo in the bottom of mine the other day. Do not know how long they've been there for but it must have been the last time I went to the cinema which was before Christmas! The worst part? The other half ate them!

    Jaq @ www.lazydaysbeauty.com

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    Replies
    1. Hahaha that's amazing. I have to admit I think if I found some haribo at the bottom of my bag I was very much contemplate eating it haha.

      Hannah xxx

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  4. haha definitely loved this post! I am with you on my bag always being full of so many random receipts! I don't know why I hang on to them because I end up just throwing them all out once enough finally pile up!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I know what you mean, why don't we just throw them away when we get them haha.

      Hannah xxx
      http://adayinthelifeofanortherngirl.blogspot.com

      Delete
  5. I laughed from beginning to end Hannah! It's 3 a.m right now and I don't know if I'm sleep deprived or not, but I was cracking up every 5 seconds! And also, you should know that I'm one of these girls who carries tiny handbags! In my defence, and as you already know, I tend to walk pretty much everywhere and having to carry a huge bag would just slow me down haha! And even worse, I NEVER bring a purse if I'm driving. I throw my phone in my coat pocket and I'm out the door !

    Hayfa
    www.londonloafers.com

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  6. Aww man phone chargers!! I FINALLY decided to get a phone charger for my car to put in the cig lighter outlet and it was one of the best things I did for my iPhone haha - you don't even know how many times my phone said it was at 20% and then literally 10 seconds later, it just dies. Like what the heck?!?! Oh iPhones...

    Cachoo Joo // CACHOO JOO

    ReplyDelete
  7. CUTE ! I REALLY LOVE THIS POST! AMAZING PICS!!!
    have u a nice sunday!
    Do you want to follow each other on instagram? I'm @chicstreetchoc! Thank uuu
    FOLLOW ME ON FACEBOOK
    CHIC STREET CHOC

    ReplyDelete
  8. This is such a funny post! Had a huge grin reading about your phone dying lol. This is a much more realistic Whats in my Bag post!! xx

    Kate | raspberrycheeks

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  9. I just found your blog, and I love it! I love the way your write, you're hilarious!
    Great post!! Beautiful purse, I am a tad jealous of it. Don't get me started on what's in MY purse. I think I have you beat on the receipt count! WHO needs all these receipts??

    Anyways I am glad I read this. Made me laugh!
    Have a great day! :)

    -Miriam

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  10. Love this post! This is exactly what my bag looks like on a daily basis :)
    Sophie x
    http://makeupmanhattanandmarc.blogspot.co.uk/

    ReplyDelete
  11. Love your honesty! Im just the same with my bag!xx

    teaandblush.com

    ReplyDelete

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